Saturday, May 11, 2013

Go Goa Gone 

ZZZ Zombie 

Now that film runs have gotten shorter and shorter, down to just opening weekend, looks like Bollywood filmmakers have decided to follow Hollywood on the summer trends—mostly silly, comic films about young men not quite in their senses, having the adventure of a lifetime. These films are obviously meant for college kids on vacation with nothing better to do, than cackle through brainless comedies, and consume giant tubs of overpriced popcorn at multiplexes.

It has been proved by Hollywood teen flicks, that their target group admires drunkenness and getting laid, gross out gags and gratuitous profanity. Raj Nidimoru and Krishna DK have to put up with Indian censors—liberal now, but not too much,  or Go Goa Gone might perhaps have been worse than it is—funny in bits, but dreadful in the end.

The directors seem to have gone to Goa and Mauritius, picked up every ragged hippie doping on the beach, dunked them in ketchup and chalk to get those slow-moving, flesh-eating, blood-sucking, brain-dead zombies. Strangely, their three ‘heroes’  (what’s with the number three fascination in Bollywood?) who seem quite clued in otherwise to social media, porn, booze, drugs and partying, don’t know what zombies are!  They are, you are told, Hollywood imports, like AIDS. These are not indigenous ghouls with their feet backwards.

 So, the dissolute Luv (Vir Das) and Hardik (Kunal Khemu), hijack their straitlaced flatmate Bunny (Anand Tiwari) and go to Goa.  There, a random bikini-clad girl called Luna (Pooja Gupta) invites them to a rave party on a remote island, organised by the Russian Mafia. (Do note, their names are meant for cheap puns!)

The three land up there, and after a night of debauchery, find themselves trapped on the island, overrun by zombies--  the result of some new drug that they consumed. The Russian Mafia, turns out to be Boris, pronounced Barees, a blonde fake (Saif Ali Khan) and his sidekick, who have figured out that the only way to kill zombies is to shoot them in the head.  “I keel dead peepal,” he declares. 

Saif’s role—he is also co-producer—is some kind of private in-joke.  He says lines like, “I’ll be back,” with an imperceptible wink, and you are supposed to go haha or lol, or whatever.

Anyway, the plotless film is about keeping the three idiots plus one on the island for the duration of the film—which means the boat they came in, floats away, promising to return in 18 hours (the boat doesn’t promise, Barees does!)  They are attacked by zombies, saved, attacked, saved and so on, with time in between, to wisecrack and hit on the girl.

In Hollywood, zombie movies by George Romero and Sam Raimi are a B-cult. Check your barf-metre when you watch the Indian version, the hideousness and gore can get a bit much.


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